Watkins Family

My son has been an angel today! Took a 4 hour nap this morning and a couple 2 hour naps throughout the day. When he is awake he has been quite happy. So I am happy. I have been meaning to write some thoughts on here. Perhaps post some pictures but now everyone sees pictures on Facebook but I will do it anyhow so when I go to print my blog I will have them in here.

I had been having thoughts about being single and being married with a family and the differences and I have decided that is all it is...different. Not worse, not better...(ok maybe a little better) not busier, not more boring, not less boring, not more exciting or less exciting...just different. We tend to get in trouble when we compare. I once heard the definition of Pride was when you started comparing yourself to others.

Time management is an interesting subject. When I was single I had discussions with other single girls that we felt there was a prejudice out there that married people thought we had all the time in the world and they were jealous of all our "free" time. We would rant about how we worked full time jobs, still held callings, and we were the sole providers and caretakers of our livelihoods. We couldn't call anyone to pick up milk on the way home or fix the drain, we were wearing all the hats in the family. I was curious to know how my perceptions would change when I get married and had children...so far here is what I observe.

In a day I might have 30 things planned...as a single person I got about 20-25 of them accomplished...as a married person...15-20...as a mom...2-5. As a mom you plan so many things in a day but don't manage to get many done..not because you are lazy but because your child takes precedence over almost everything...when he is completely dependent upon you and he eats every 2 hours and inbetween then you have to change him and burp him and cuddle him..well it pretty much takes up the whole day for now.

I used to jump in the car and run around to all my errands...I might skip one or change the order or not get to all of them, but as a mom I have to plan VERY carefully. Will my child wake up in the middle of my shopping and start screaming in the store because he is hungry? What will I do? Abandon my cart? let him cry and suffer the stares? When I see he is in for a longer sleep I jump in the car and take him instead of sleeping myself. The same goes for cooking dinner and cleaning around the house. You are sleep deprived and just not able to do as much, not making what you do any more or less important.

So I think married people get jealous of the freedom of choice and mobility that a single person has...and even when I was single I recognized that freedom and knew one day it wouldn't always be that way. However, as a mom my chores and caretaking bring me great and everlasting joy. I am not upset when my son cried half the night, he is so adorable and he is mine so I don't seem to mind too much as hard as it gets some days.

I guess my ultimate conclusion goes back to the beginning where I say it is dangerous to try to compare any lives, any trials, any burdens, any joys. We are all in life and each of us is at a different point at a different time and place. My experience as a mom will be completely different than anyone else's due to my past, present and future experiences and conditions. We will all have good time and tough times.

My friend said it the best I think when she guessed the purpose of life was to learn to have and maintain healthy relationships. I could agree with that. My husband Mike always reminds me to live in the present. Don't worry about the past, there is not anything you can do to change it...don't worry about the future...it isn't real because it hasn't happened yet...just live in the present and do your best at this moment. Pretty good advice if you ask me.